T_T

It almost 2 days...

It's 9 p.m. now ....

Will be actual 2 days when it comes to 2.00 am

I think it will be good for you now...

although it takes time to recover...

and for us to be used to it....

Sorry for that...

Hope you can get through it...

Maybe this way will be good to both of us...

7 November 2011

why everything happens again?

it' s really killing me...

am i doing the right decision/ choice?

these few days i keep asking myself the same question...

O Lord.. what should i do now?

pls teach me how to work it out..

Pls do tell me what should i do now?

every1 is deserve a chance...

but Lord, am i doing the right thing or just the Love blind my eyes...

my heart so pain, Lord...

Pls cure my heart Lord..

Pls do give me strength Lord

To work all of these out, Lord...

Amen

1 August 2011

It's such a tired trimester....

Bad things never stop coming to me...

Sometimes really feel wanna throw everything out my life...

It's really terrible to go through all of these kind of life....

The worst thing is that I couldn't find anyone to talk to...

Hahahahahha.... :( it's not because i don't want to share of...

Just sometimes we just can't say it out...

God is my only listener now...

He is really my best listener ever in my life...

He heard all of my prayers and always create miracles on me....

This is the reason why I never give up on....

I just hope that everything will just pass away...

Because living in such days really killing me off...

that kind of life, feeling...

No one could ever imagine that....

Thanks Lord for never giving up on me....

I hope these all incidents would be my Life Time Testimonial.....

27 May 2011

it's such a long time that i didn't update my blog....

many things had happened.....

and my life just turn upside down...

thanks Wilson that he always be along with me when i'm needed at most...

without him, i think i couldn't stand up and start over new life....

thanks to my gang for being supportive....

during these all period....

all of you have brighten my life....

a lot of sad things happened to me...

most important i need to thank God....

without u, i think i couldn't be that tough and strong to face all the challenges...

Thanks Lord....

having trip to Malacca with Nic, Janice, Kah Ann, Kim Hoong and Wilson...

so sad that mica and kiddo couldn't join us....

however having a lot of fun time...

thanks guys...

and especially to wilson....

Thanks for accompany me without any return...

and treated me with your true and most sincere heart....

I'm Sad Today....

I read our blog just now...

He asked me to release himself...

and also release myself...

I feel so sad....

Don't know what to do....

I can release him....

But not myself.....

How can I tell him that how much I love him....

How can I tell him that I never regret of being with him....

How can I tell him that he mean so much to me....

How can I tell him that I never mind about all his weaknesses...

The one that I love is only him....

My heart was so pain....

How can I let him know about that...?

what can i do to know his mind...?

10 March 2011

Today is our day.....
I should be very happy....
But I didn't...

This is the first month of our separation....
It's nearly a month after that night....
I could not remember the date, just remember that it's on Sunday....

I feel that that night I was doing the right thing...
To make him pissed off....
Angry...
So that he could actually expresssed his anger....
Yes... on me....

After that incident. I lose him....
Yes... I really lose him...
Maybe he didn't know it by now about what is the purpose that make me choose this way...

I never regret that i did that...
Just regret that I lose him in my life...
I never love a guy in such way...
Never.... Not even my first love...

I love him too much until i have to put all the pains on myself...
Maybe he's hiding his pain....
I don't know...

I'm not dare to assume it...
because i scare i will hurt myself once again....
In his eyes, i live better than before...
Live better than when the time we were together...
But he never know that...
My heart didn't feel joy like last time....
My heart didn't feel warm like last time...
My heart did't feel like blissfull like last time....

He told me that I will find better guy in future...
But he told me before he will be the best guy in my life....
Don't push me another guy..
Please don't do that to me....
I have my rights to choose the guy that I want to live with...
To choose the guy I want to spend my life with....

Lossing him make me feel that i lose myself too...
I don't find myself anymore....
I am not who I am anymore......

Pls Dont Give Up

I realized that he started to give up on himself le....

I'm not sure whether i got guess right or not...

I really hope that i can help him....

He is really a good person...

and he doesn't deserve to behave in that way...

Lord....,

I know...

Only You can help him to stand up....

Only You can Brighten his life....

Only You can cure his heart, lord....

Lord, I know You are listening to my words Lord...

I pray Lord...

I Pray Sincerely Lord...

That You Will help him to stand up....

In The Name Of Jesus I pray Lord,

AMEN.....